Aint that just a bitch
Faith is a strange thing.
We start from either of two extremes.
We either go in for a blind acceptance of a belief, an idea.
or we opt for complete denial of it.
As life goes on and as we grow we find our way to the middle of the road.
Somewhere in that middle path of space and time in our mind we find the place where the two reactions meet to form an understanding that we are comfortable with.
Once we reach that understanding we learn to believe it, to trust it.
Give it all that we didn’t or couldn’t in the beginning.
Our trust in that idea becomes complete.. non questioning,
beyond reproach, beyond doubts ,beyond questions
We do this because all of us need faith.. Not in the sense that we need faith in something.
I mean that all of us naturally want to believe in everything.
I want to believe that beggar on the street who says that he needs the money that he asks of me to buy medicines for his sister, I want to believe my parents when they say that they have my best interests in mind, I want to believe my government when they say that they are doing the best they can, I want to believe in god...
But I cant .. not always ... not everything..
I cant because I’ve seen too much , I’ve heard too much, I’ve read too much, I know too much..
I’ve lost my innocence. I’ve lost my faith..
A part of me mourns the death of yet another idea.. the cynical post mortem of yet another institution.. he disdains the contemptuous, cynical nihilist that he fears that he may become... he feels like he is being compelled to grow up too soon.
But the other part rejoices at having grown up.. he gets that feeling which we get after an intense work out.. he feels tired as hell but at the same time he gets that inner glow ..that smug feeling of knowing that you have just become stronger.. of knowing that he is a little more ready for the big fight.. he feels like atlas who has just shrugged.
This is not my story..
This is everybody's story.. From the day we were born we have tried to "grow".. but the more we grow the more we realize that we were better off without it . Yet we already put in motion a series of events over which we do not have control any more. We would do anything to reclaim our innocence.. To be the meek who shall inherit the earth..
but we are meek no more and aint that just a bitch..
posted by AJ @ 11:41 PM
6 comments
6 Comments:
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This is good stuff bro. Very analytically philosophic, I see.
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